Heart Of The 80s

FRIDAY
Evening
March 18, 1988

Hi! Sorry for not reporting the news yesterday because I was so-so-so heartbroken and at the same time overwhelmed of something  that should've made me glad yesterday.

I went to school yesterday at past 7, yes it was late but then classes are getting irregular these days. Not much students going there now, except those like us who plan to go somewhere after school, simply meeting up with our friends there. As soon as I arrived, I sat down at the Triangle shed together with Amy, Virginia, Imelda, Vangie and others while we were waiting for something (?) I've been there for half an hour already when one by one the students were leaving. Then Brendon entered the school gates but my heart did now  beat wildly this time (GOOD!)

After a while, Amy and I were talking, then she asked,"Do you know someone named Brian?"
Me: (suddenly surprised, and stood up) "Ha? Why, what about him?" Now there, I was really interested and got hurt..
Amy: "Isn't Brian, Ms Jane's BF?"
Me: "That's not true, I heard they are cousins-"
Amy:(didn't let me finish) "No, because Vangie told me so!"
Me: (kind of piqued already) "Hmm, so who told that to Vangie?"
Amy: "Michael"
Me: "How come?!" (still really not believing)
Amy: "Michael is Vangie's bestfriend. Vangie told me Ms Jane's BF is Brian, didn't you tell me something about Brian?"
Me: "No, I didn't." [I don't remember confiding those kinds of things to anyone, not even Amy by bestfriend/seatmate, until I was sure] Then I remembered, it was Daryl...ayyy!

And after that Amy and I just talked about other things, but despite that, I felt bad really close to crying, but I cannot let it show. TSE!!! STOP! STOP! STOP! I tell myself whenever I remember everything Brendon has said.

And this other news, I should've written yesterday too but then it would remind me of the Brendon, Brian,Dean brothers because this guy's name is Brian also.

DIRECTLY TO THE POINT: I saw Brian Amor again! (from 1985, cute eyes, college boy from Lyceum) Desiree, Sandra and I were riding a commuter jeepney on our way to Elisa's Cinema when I saw this guy riding in another jeepney as we stopped in traffic. He smiled. then he's gone.. but wait.. that's not all, something else shocking happened...[trust me, I was overreacting!] .. He was with his friend and they got off the jeepney and transferred to the one we were riding in! How overwhelming!

Brian:"Hello.."
Me: "Hi!" (keep smiling, keep shining!)
Brian: "Where are you going?"
Me: (Sorry, God, I lied) "Just there, my friend's house"
Brian:" Uh.. what is your name again?"
Me:"Ha...eh..." (Bad, he forgot my name, aha...!) "Richred"
Desiree: "Let's go down now.." That's at the Luzon Colleges still. But Desiree was anxious for me already. [my friends were all the conservative kind, they don't want boys chasing us]
Me:(to Desiree) "Ok, sige" (to Brian) "Eh, we're stopping here now"
Brian: "Okay, we'll stop here too." Yaiiks

As were were walking, going toward Elisa's Cinema, I whispered to Desiree and Sandra, "Buenas, Desiree! Why is this happening?" Desiree smiled, a knowing smile. They went walking ahead of me, and as I walked as slow as I can but I'm thinking why and what for?

Then Brian called me again, "Where are you in Mangaldan?"
Me: (I didn't lie this time) "Just the private school near the Catholic church, just ask my schoolmates" [haha, was I so popular then? haha I don't think so. Just that my name is foreign-sounding]
Brian: (still not getting it clear) "What room  number?"
Me: (Ohmygosh, making sure to find me!) "Just tell my name and ask for me"
Brian: "What's your last name?"
Me: "Buelchmann"
Brian: "I beg your pardon?"
Me: (Haay, my blood is beginning to boil, smile) "Buelchmann .. ah, basta.. I knew you know it already before"
Brian: "Okay, see you, nice meeting you..."
Me: (so glad he's going now) I quickly walked to keep pace with Desiree and Sandra as we were near the cinema already. We hurriedly walked to the Elisa's Cinema entrance. And as we were paying for our movie tickets, out of the corner of my eye I saw Brian and his friend 30 meters away approaching, so after paying for our tickets we ran inside the movie theater to avoid then and the three of us were giggling  like crazy...!

Hmm, I think I don't like Brian now, because he's not-so handsome anymore unlike before he was so like Robby Rosa when he's dressed up [read: so 80's] Now he's just plain Brian Amor! And he acts to presko that day as if he can find me and is still welcome in my life. Tsooo late, my darling, because I'll be leaving for Manila soon and no one can stop me! Nevah!!! [ I was trying to sound like Maricel Soriano in 'Taray and Teroy']

Richred <3

P.S. I still like Brian (Brendon's brod)  very much!

next next

[This is to update my A Day in Life entries, here's me starting over]

SUNDAY                                                                                                       Morning
March 6, 1988

Hi! Hello! Couldn't quite remember all the other days just that I know Brendon is ERASE-ERASE in my life and all I remember is what happened yesterday (because all other days were boring!)

I will relive everything in this diary =  the good and the bad parts (because without the bad, the thrill would be gone, but then that's only a few to mention)

On that morning, I woke up at 7:00 AM then went to the Post Office to mail my credentials for the college entrance exam in Manila. Then I went home and cleaned house. While I was still applyibng wax on the floor, Uncle Joe came to visit from Manila. I felt sad Lara and Jerome wasn't with him those are my cousins by the way, see my 1986 entries.But then Uncle said Ate Edith will also come home from Manila that day, so there I was more delighted to clean house!

On that afternoon, Ate Edith, Ate Mimie and Kuya Ed arrived (Kuya Rey is not with them). By the way, Ate Mimie wont be going back to Manila because her baby is due this month.

On that night, Bacon, Naning and the rest passed by our house and tagged me along going to the plaza. (It was Mangaldan Fiesta that time) First we went to was the horror booth that lloks scary from the outside because of the scary sounds, but actually only mannequins and monsters made out of plastic were inside. I was with Ate Weda, Bacon, Naning and I kind of lost my voice screaming over those monsters on display! The scary part was only the walk around the area, waiting what will frighten me next.After that, I wanted to find something scarier (and more unique) so I said, "Bacon, let's watch the Wall Of Death - the one with two Arabian guys who would perform stunts riding a motorcycle while going round in circles defying gravity. After getting tickets, something unexpected for me happened as we were queueing up ... I saw Brendon's Brod and he smiled at me like he knew me from before!! He's so cute!! [haha me so infatuated over 'handsome guys' I could've fainted!] He was right infront of me lining up to enter the place but I saw an old lady from our street who talked to me awhile. [distraction for me] Then later, the audience including us all got to enter to watch the show. I almost fell on the floor not watching my steps, just  because I was looking for him where he went [hahaha that was so me!!]. When Bacon and I got to the ring, I was still looking at the stairs that may be Brendon's Brod would  be there. Then as I looked out front of me, there he was!!! He waved at me to know he was there!! :) (Naks, Ha!) Then we smiled at each other everytime our eyes met and he seemed to wink at me (I aint sure coz he was far across from me) Oh I think I like him! (Oops, I don't know him that much really, he's just a stranger) After the Wall Of Death show, Bacon and I went around the plaza again. I was pretending to be really interested in looking around but I really was searching for Brendon's brod. Sure he was there again but a few meters away from us, and couldn't see me but he looks like he was looking for someone (looking for me, huh?!? love you!!)

Meanwhile, Bacon got really bored so he said,"Let's go to Elsie's Canteen" and I just said yes. Then something unfortunately unexpected was there! Who else but Mr. Eeeks!!! [Bacon's 24-year-old uncle who became my boyfriend in 1986, yes my aversion for this guy is also written here. I don't know really why I was like that then, I was so childish] I almost thought Bacon and Mr. Eeeks planned meeting there. But it's not likely because they were both surprised to see each other. Secretly I was so upset and wanted to just go away, go home, run... yaiiiks! And there Mr. Eeeks kept asking me how I was, how life has been, so on and so forth and I just gave him the cold shoulder, just answering yes, no, maybe. Mr. Eeeks asked us not to go yet, asking please dont go yet but I was really anxious to go back to the plaza to have fun. AND because Bacon and I had not much money, ha-ha, (you know what I mean!) he tagged along with us back to the plaza. Mr. Eeeks gladly paid for tickets to any show we wanted to see. But he kept holding my hand once in a while and pretending to hug me. I was so badtrip because as we went around the plaza, some of my batchmates saw me with Mr. Eeeks, but I would slip away and go near Bacon instead.  [oh, man! I was so mean to Mr. Eeeks! Up to this time, I like to say sorry for everything. I really was so mean!] I still searched for Brendon's brod from the JS Prom but now he was invisible. That's it- the good parts and the bad parts of my day- but deep inside my heart, I wanted to see PX.

I love PX!
I like Brendon's Brod very much!

loving everyone, (except...)
Richred


*** The Plaza is a common place we go do during Fiesta where you can get to ride scary rides, watch magic shows and so on. it's like the Great America of the 80's haha


MY NEXT DIARY ENTRY IS HERE

[Yes, I'm back! And just like this February 20,1988 entry below I've been offline for ages. Sorry dear friends and readers, I was extremely busy assisting my aunt and her hubby from California during their month-long stay here in the Philippines. So the 1988 string of diary entries continues...]

Saturday
Afternoon
February 20, 1988
Oh no, it's been a week since, isn't it? And I have not reported the latest events in here but anyway, I'll tell you what events sound significant to me...

Last Sunday (February 14, 1988) I had a boring celebration of Valentine's Day, I mean - my heart felt so bored, because I've got no love to give and no love to receive :) What we did here, together with my cousin Ate Edith and her sister-in-law Ate Mimie, was to shop and window-shop at Harrison Plaza and also to buy tickets for Pops Fernandez and Martin Nievera's POPS AND MARTIN's concert "Twosome"(1988) at the Folk Arts Theater.

Much later we watched a movie "Misis Mo, Misis Ko" starring Jackielou Blanco and Ricky Davao. Then that evening, we watched POPS  AND MARTIN's concert. Oh, did I say while we were stuck in traffic going to the Folk Arts Theater, that the teen star Isabel Granada's car was just next  to the taxi we took? Oh yes, she's so pretty ( with long curly lashes and light brown hair) and charming and even nice to us fans! She smiled and waved back to us! Her mom is a charmer too. [Isabel Granada is really my personal favorite over the years, I've watched a few of her movies from Seiko Films, and her presence oftentimes I see in my dreams that I wondered if I would have a pretty daughter like her someday]
 So the next day, Monday (February 15, 1988) Ate Mimie and I went to the Deutsche Botschaft then on the Bank Of America along Paseo De Roxas in Makati. After that we went to SM Shoemart Makati but still nothing worth exciting. Except for Ate Mimie's wonderful stories of life here in Manila and how she wants
to go back to our province when she gives birth to their eldest. We went home by noon.

Then by 3PM, we went to St. Scholastica's College - St.Scho -  to get an entrance exam form. I saw some "sosyal" [that means bourgeoisie] ladies and I'm now beginning to dread that school. It would be so boring for me! [why I said that, is because I felt the ladies were way too high class or maybe I didn't like their uniform which was then cut like an SM saleslady's uniform] So we hopped on next to St. Paul College Manila (SPCM) It's another exclusive school for girls like St. Scho. I loved the ladies uniforms, they look very professional. But uh-oh I felt bad again coz a lady there stared at me so I stared back, and frowned at her. "Who's she?" I mumbled myself. Ate Mimie said what attitude these ladies are showing are all pretense.
Oh what a day to go around Manila and to see most people being snobbish! Hmmp!

The following day, Tuesday (February16,1988) I went back to Pangasinan with Ate Mimie's cousin Melissa. We took the Pantranco Bus early at dawn and arrived home at exactly 12:00 noon. I didn't have the strength to go to school that afternoon so I just stayed home.

Wednesday (February 17, 1988) I went back to school. I'm beginning to hate Brendon. Why? Coz he's beginning to talk with Sheila again and I think they're getting back to each other again. (SO???) Oh, and about my friend in school, Gigi according to Dess, she attempted to commit suicide by slicing her pulse [yes, that was my term] but just then her old rich man suitor visited and her problems were eased. [Gigi was my one of my bestfriends at STHS. She resembled Janice De Belen- one of the beautiful teen  actresses during the 80's. Gigi was still my good friend until she passed away in 1993. She, her sister and her mom were my spiritual friends who shared their faith in Christ with me]

On Thursday (February 18, 1988), our class had a very memorable religious recollection at the MAZM in Mangaldan and the event really stabbed my heart [oh please] I began to realize I was mistaken for some things and that I should think things over in the coming days. That afternoon, we all went back to submit out "DEAR JESUS" letter. Whom have I seen? oh , yes... Brendon (ehek!) and Sheila seated beside each other, still writing their letters to submit. Now I don't want  him no more.

 Yesterday (February 19,1988) - Nothing so special happened except the JS Prom. Let's just get straight to the JS Prom topic, ok? [Truth is,  I have much to say about how I painstakingly prepared for the JS Prom. Thinking in my mind that this will be the best night so far. I fussed much about my hair and make-up. My JS 80s prom dress looked alright. I chose this 80s prom dress because it looked like the dress Brooke Shields wore at the party scene in the 80s movie "Endless Love" I thought then the dress was so hip! haha. But then I think I overdid it by matching the attire with flashy red dangling earrings, sequin waist belt, and red shoes with silk lace like the ones ballerinas wear. I paired the shoes with white stockings, but of course! Looking back in retrospect, I must've been a strong headed girl for going on with it and not listening to my superiors' advice. Waah! That was me, a fashion victim! And I'm still searching for a photo of me at the JS Prom in 1988 among my high school batchmates, just for laughs!] 


 So that was it, when I arrived that evening, Dess led me to the Bonifacio classroom as we waited with the rest. Then someone gave me a rose, it was just my nephew Bacon (younger by 3 years) who was supposed to be my escort [or watchman should be the proper term].Later we all went to the STHS quad for the JS Prom proper. A moment later, as I was seated, someone behind me handed me three red roses.. it was Sam ( one of my decent classmates at Bonifacio section; he was almost my partner at the Rigodon De Honor Dance) I was just polite to him that evening and said, "Thanks." He must've summoned up the courage to talk to me some more, asked me if I the chair beside me was already taken and if he could sit beside me. I said, "Sure" He asked me if I had an escort - I stammered: "Y-y-yes, b-but he left for a while" coz at that time Bacon went to the town plaza. [ I didn't tell him that my escort wasn't really my partner, but my nephew-bodyguard so I didn't get into mischief. I pretended to have an awesome escort out there] Ok, so maybe, Sam expected me to speak to him but when I didn't say anything more, he left. [typical teenage snobbish behavior or what we call in our local dialect "suplada" ]

I kept looking at the JS Prom invitation and what was written at the back like First Dance, Favorite Partner, etc. and that time I had no name to list there to :))  I happened to see Sam far back and I think he frowned at me (or was that my imagination?) But he smiled at me later when I looked at him again. Ooops, don't get me wrong, dear diary, he's not my Valentino, I'm just being nice...... 

But there's still more.... when the Candlelight Ceremony started, we all queued up. It so happened that Honey (one who had a crush on Dean - that's Brendon's brod) was infront of me. We both went to our places at formation which looked not the way it was practiced. We happened to be at the Junior's group, where Dean was!! He wasn't Honey nor I's partner though. But still, he said "Hi!" to Honey and I felt....uh-oh sad. But it was such a nice and wonderful moment just to see Dean closer. And it was real stupid of me to look or stare at Dean so I just turned away, pretended to be interested in looking at other people and be amused at their corny moments.. oh, sick, sick, sick, sick! 


There's something more, after the Candlelight Ceremony  when we got back to our seats, there was a guy just behind us who looked handsome, kind of rugged. He resembled a mix of familiar faces. Everytime I glanced back at Dess or Sarah, I catch him staring at me. But he didn't matter to me, coz I only can see his face from the crowd and besides, I just found him semi-handsome ( I told Dess that he kind of looks like Ricky Davao) But not until I saw his face closer and the shirt that he was wearing, did I recognize him! I shot a quick glance at him. Hmm, he looks like my "brod" Dean and isn't the shirt that he's wearing now the one Brendon wore on the Cultural Presentation Night? Oh, yes, he must be my brod-in-law (Again!!!) Lanie was speaking the truth, Brendon's brothers are all good-looking that ladies get cross-eyed not knowing whom to look at first if they are all together! [lol] That same guy glanced at me and I glanced back. And because he's my _ _ _, I smiled and he smiled too. oops, he might think I have a crush on him just because I smiled. Anyways, whatever happens then so be it. Then he came closer, just took a seat at a vacant chair nearby. We just kept on smiling at each other in between pauses at the JS Prom dance. But it was too impossible that we would speak to each other because Kuya Johnny (our older bodyguard) and Bacon were there! If only I wasn't shy, I would ask him for starters : "Are you Brendon's brother?" It would have been awesome!! Whew!    Goodnight!!!  luv,luv,luv    ... Red
 

Saturday 021388 Alive In Manila!

Afternoon
Dear Diary,
Hi and Hello! yes, now we are here in Manila and things came unexpectedly! Is there a proverb like that? Expect the unexpected as long as it's the best! So much fun!

But wait, here's something that I can't tell if it's sad or what... yesterday... morning, I saw Brendon kidding around with Sheila while the guys in class were looking at the 'censored' Valentine card. Our classmates at group 4 and 5 laughed at them.I said to myself: "No chance, kiddo, surely they will be back together again" Wasn't it just months ago when Brendon used to often frown at her, but look now - he's back to joking with her and Sheila's going gaga over him. Ahh, I don't know if I should cry or what, ah.... basta, I felt so angry seeing them together! [add a crying face here for me ;'( that's what I meant that time] And maybe that afternoon, they were really back together. I ain't sure coz I skipped classes again because it's Friday afternoon, I went to the movies at Rodela Cinema to watch "Stupid Cupid" with Matt.

Now here is something I must confess to you, dear diary. It was very very bad of me, but hey.. Before I went home that noon, I went back inside our classroom when all the students left. I searched for the 'censored' Valentine card but I couldn't find it, at first. But something pushed me to open the attendance record at the teacher's desk and... (would you believe?).. the 'censored' Valentine card I was looking for was right there clipped inside the attendance record book!! I hurriedly took it and shoved it inside my folder.. and went out as if nothing happened. Tsk,tsk,tsk! Sorry, my dear talented classmate Benny, sorry for your artistic talent in creating the 'censored' card. hmm, what can I say!!! [I still feel bad about taking the Valentine card. But on hindsight, maybe I saved the whole class from making our Physics teacher, Mr. Soco, furious. I mean, what reaction from a prim and proper, no-nonsense teacher would they expect? So, up to this day, no one knows I took this 'censored' Valentine card]

Here in Manila, this afternoon.. Ate Mimie, Melissa and I took a public jeepney to Harrison Plaza to watch some stars on a Valentines fans day. Who was there? Wow!!!!  Lea Salonga (I love her!!), Sheryl Cruz (Yahoo! I really admire!) Jestoni Alarcon (yes, really!) Dennis Da Silva ( loveteam partner of Ruffa, they say he looks like Ricky Martin), Ruffa Gutierrez (she's so cute and pretty!) and Romnick Sarmenta!!!! (Yeheyyy! Romnick, I love you!) [I so wish that we had a camera back then to take some photos, now so sorry. But maybe someone out there reminiscing with me can provide one. I'd be grateful!]

PX, I love you.... [that was really written, I wonder why.. when he was out of touch this season.]

still, Red

Acknowledgements to Pinas Dekada 80 for the photo

Wednesday
Evening
021088

Dear Diary,
Sorry about being absent for more than a week. [what an excuse letter expert I was then] I was busy on that Thursday and Friday about my luv letter to Brendon and on that Saturday I was worrying if I'd still send it and I worried about it and I didn't have time to write/report all the important events here. And on that Sunday, I was suddenly asked to go to Manila to report at the Deutsche Botschaft. And I forgot to bring you, dear diary, with me.. sorry, ha?

Well, first.. here we go with the dreams I had when I was in Manila... on that Sunday night, I dreamt of Brendon and Sheila. They were friends already and they were very happy, as happy as the closest friends. But in my dream, Sheila only wanted a cigarette from Brendon!.. how bizarre... But this morning, I overheard Sheila talk about Brendon, about the words he wrote on the our classroom wall [highschoolers are known for this bad habit] on the next Monday night, I dreamed of Dean* and his real girlfriend (according to Dess). Dean's girlfriend went to our room and told me there are some people backbiting me and Dean is defending me (WOW,Ha!) ... And here's what happened in reality between Dean and me is that he greeted me hello as we passed by each other at the Practical Arts building, and when we passed by each other in front of the plaza. I just smiled sweetly but I looked down because I felt shy.

And well, what happened on that Monday... first, Ate Edith, my mama, Matt and I went to the Deutsche Botschaft and as usual, Matt was acting silly. Why? when we took the elevator he acted funny and said there was an earthquake! (haha) Oh yah, we got a problem at the embassy because I had no ID with me so I've got to go back this Saturday (so by Valentine's Day I won't be here in the province)... Then after we went to the embassy, we headed to Bank Of America next.

Matt was acting sillier this time because of the automatic swinging doors - you know, the ones you just step on and it opens by itself. [yes, during the 80s automatic swinging doors was a novelty] Here goes Matt, gaping at every person that passes through the door. Ay probinsyano! Hay!

.... Afterwards, we all went to the SM Food Center at SM Makati and then we went shopping! Later we went home to rest a little. By late afternoon, Ate Edith and I went to the movies at Greenbelt Cinema (my most favorite cinema house with the romantic lover's lane, the most American McDonald's and remember my 2nd year high school days 012786?) We watched the movie "Ibulong Mo Sa Diyos" starring Vilma Santos, Gary Valenciano, Eric Quizon and Miguel Rodriguez. This movie made me cry, especially when I heard the song "Sana Maulit Muli" can't help but think of PX and how I miss him. Maybe it's because PX is a huge fan of Gary V.

The next day, Ate Mimie accompanied me at the University Of Santo Tomas UST for my application for entrance exam. I chose BACHELOR OR ARTS IN HISTORY and BACHELOR OF SECONDARY EDUCATION MAJOR IN HISTORY. Ate Mimie took me around the UST campus since it's the university she went to and is most familiar with. She said the school is not what it looks like, the students there have an easy-go-lucky attitude, the guys are bolero, the ladies are vain but still studies must be taken seriously. Hmm, I like the school.. I love the old Spanish buildings, the facade looks the same as ours in my high school Santo Tomas here in the province. Isn't this how buildings in Puerto Rico look like? hahaha having thoughts of Robby Rosa again! Hay, I hope I pass the exam...

Okay, so this morning at school, Brendon kidded me he's borrowing ten bucks sana. I smiled/frowned, haha. He went at the back of our room and announced: "Who's got ten bucks, lend me please!" then after a while he called my name again but I tried so hard not to look back because I was busy with our assignment. Besides I didn't know if he received the love letter na. On this afternoon, though, I found out he got it already. Saw his name written on the blackboard by the principal's office for the mail. Oh.. but I haven't seen him this afternoon because he was absent.

So that's the latest report for today. I'm closing this entry with Richie Valens' "C'mon Let's Go!"
Good night....

Red

[Who's Dean? That's Brendons's younger brother who was the campus crush. I didn't really know him :)]


For the next entry 

[I am so inspired today to just go ahead and begin a series of these blog entries I will call "A Day In Life". This series present the text from my journals that I kept between the ages of 14 and 17. I'll be adding new entries every now and then to share all my thoughts, ideas, events, experiences, memories, ideas I had during the eighties. It is for my continued amusement that I read and reread my old journals, even when there isn't much content, I still gain occasional insight how I'm still in the process of changing to maturity. Most of the names have been changed to protect the people I recently found on Facebook. A few are just partial entries, my bleeping and blinding exclamations have been removed and some entries have been modified to give way to my now correct spelling and grammar. Yet the mix of excitement, melodrama and pleasant memories from the eighties are still much felt :) I hope, as you read my old journal with me, you enjoy the same sentiments.]

WEDNESDAY Evening 10:30PM
February 3,1988  020388

Dear Diary,

This is some kind of a day. I'll start it from the very beginning...
This morning, Brendon( changed his name from RF to Brendon now) was not so late in coming to school. After checking our test papers in Filipino, he went to the faculty  room and volunteered to distribute the envelopes and of course, my envelope was there. But, Dan, our other classmate, offered to help him (OH!) and unfortunately, my envelope was given to me by Dan. (Aargh!) 

But then later, a campaign brochure from Baguio Colleges Foundation (now University of the Cordilleras) and the college courses offered were distributed. I was talking to my guy seatmate Daryl, just asking about the course descriptions. 
Me: "What is BSE?"
Daryl: "It's a course for teachers, of course!"
Me: "For highschool teachers?"
Daryl :"Yeah"
Me: "But what is this CMT and CAT? Can ladies enroll in this course? Maybe there are plenty of handsome guys here, eh?"
Daryl : (laughing) "Ha-ha. You're kidding, right?"
Me: " I had to ask!" More giggles.
Me: "Ok, now I know what course I'll take up. This is really it... BSE HISTORY MAJOR!"  [I loved history subjects because of all the hilarious stories by our effervescent history teachers.]
Daryl : (shrugs) "Sure you can..."
Me: " I'll be a teacher and would be teaching in this school. By then there would be plenty of handsome co-teachers too!" [Was only jesting for amusement] So that conversation lasted until I read more details to ask about.... Just then, Brendon came up beside   Daryl and held the same brochure that I was holding that time. Brendon and I both looked/gazed/stared (whatever) at each other for a few seconds, and I shivered. But oops,   Daryl said to Brendon: "Pare, this is Red's" So Brendon goes apologetically: "Okay.." Then went away. Aaargh! To  Daryl!

This afternoon, Brendon went in very late around 1:45PM. A visitor from the EARN computer school was  promoting their courses and encouraging us to study in their school. Around that time, Brendon came in but no one got distracted anyway. Later, our class took a scholarship exam for 30 minutes. A long time of silence. Then the proctor asked: "Is it difficult?" We all gave out a giggle. Brendon, who was seated at the far corner,said: "Chicken feed!".. haha, I said to Daryl: (who was seated just behind us - and copying my answers): "Hmm, we'll see!" Anyways, no time for that now.

Oh and much later, the wall between our room and the Aguinaldo section's room fell over the head of Sheila - Brendon's ex. I glanced quickly at Brendon seeing his expression if he will care for her. Nothing there. I think he sort of felt sorry for her but just smiled to himself. We all went back to our work. After the exam, Brendon went out to play basketball at the STHS court.

Other topic, I have something very very important to tell you, dear diary, and I fear it will happen. Matt, my 11-year-old nephew, is not so happy and said the world will end soon this March 18,1988 right after the eclipse. I'm praying that it won't happen. I hope God will not get angry at us here on earth, I'll try to be good already. Okay good night, dear diary.

[Now I think this was an awesome day :) All the people I mention here are every now and then in touch with me thanks to Facebook. Who's Brendon, you say? He's a former classmate for whom I've had a great silly crush- just like that. No, he never knew and only one or two close friends knew. Anyways, these were my best days so to speak]



Here was my next Entry

022686
Evening                                                                                                      Wednesday

Hello! No matter what I want to do, I really can't sleep

Because I saw PX unexpectedly this afternoon. I say unexpected because I was thinking all the while that he was in Baguio City. But I really had an intuition that he's here in the town all along. Is it he wants to know if I am sincere or rather he wants to surprise me.

We got a little bit of gap, a serious problem and I wonder how to overcome it. It's PX that's why.. he wants the whole universe to know that we are steady but I always try to clear it all up with him.. that my mom is very strict and I wouldn't know what to do if my mom would find out. I don't know about WhenTheCatIsAway, if he will stand up for me.

If only I didn't have these problems, no need to ask. I'd gladly announce to the world that PX is my bf. I just don't want my mom to know, that's all. She would go berserk for sure.

The pains of being 14! But I really love him!

PX, I LOVE YOU.. so please take your time in knowing me well first. Things are going too fast, please understand! I LOVE YOU! (1,000,000,000,000x)


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021886
Tuesday
Evening

Good evening, dear diary. My uncle from Germany has not arrived, I overheard my mom and cousins saying he changed his plans of traveling because of the Marcos-Aquino Elections.

Well, that means we could go back home to the province early tomorrow! Why am I glad? 'coz I want to see PX. I cried last night about this sudden emergency that I had to go to Manila. I hate such things that, example: there are two sweethearts then one day, the other will leave without the other's permission or good bye. [I was really melodramatic as a teen, hehe] Just like that when I left Ralph in Tuguegarao, just like leaving PX. But anyway, I'll be home tomorrow.

I don't know still what to do about PX since the last time we talked. I love him. I miss him, I feel like... whammo! [that means full of energy]   :))

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Monday
121786
Evening

Everdearest Diary,
We are going to Manila tomorrow kasi I'm badly needed and I'm in danger co'z I don't know how to get my way by not going there this time. What am I going to do, I have not said anything to PX yet.

I saw PX unexpectedly this afternoon. He really said he is in love with me. I almost melted, I almost wanted to kiss him and tell him "Iluvyouverymuch" but then I'm really watching my brains so that I won't go wacky! I don't understand why I am so silent when I'm with PX. Perhaps something is wrong with me.

I like to explain something to PX before we totally go together.[what a term I use for steady] I think it's about my situation, my mother's situation. [my mother was strict, so very very strict] Surely he won't understand, he doesn't know the real me. He doesn't know this girl he admires.

I hope God makes me brave enough to say to PX my personal situation.

I Love PX!!! (1,000,000,000,000x)

Read the next 80s diary entry here

Wednesday
February 12, 1986
Evening

Hello!Hello!Hello! I saw PX today!!! Yeheyy! It felt like the world just stopped, and it felt like I could hear Robby Rosa singing "Like An Explosion" over the crowd!

(exact spot of the bus stop where I found him again)Thanks to flickr for the photo


Same story like yesterday, I was with ES again waiting for Ate Baybee. We both crossed the road toward Philippine Lumber to wait for the incoming buses going back to YBTTC*. We were waiting for the next bus then, and still talking. ES began by asking me if Ate Baybee said anything about him, I felt unsure where it was leading to,so I just said "None." (then I just looked the other way) Who did I see a little bit further?! There was PX!!! We both smiled and walked toward each other, and ES was gone in a flash!! would you believe that?! [Yes, when you're in love with love, everything just stops. All you can see is the object of your affection. :) ES was gone? Hmm, I don't think so, I think I was just rude not to tell him to wait a sec]

So PX and I just talked, about what's the latest. PX said.. 'that I'm his crush' and he will see me tomorrow at school!!!!

So I beg you, pleez gimme a vacation to keep you coz we are in danger of my mom and you might fly all my secrets away. See you!! [Yes, after all that time, my mom saw me hiding my diary in a secret place I marked hidden wealth, hahaha, it's a Marcos election terminology]

Red


*What's YBTTC? It's my own term for our sleepy town stands for "You Belong To The City" (shrugs) I don't know why :)

*Who's this PX from the 80s? Visit here
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021186
Evening
Tuesday

Hello. Ralph's day today but I dedicate this day to PX though still he hasn't shown up.I'm not angry anymore. Instead, I feel so sorry for myself that I won't be spending Valentine's Day.My observation about year '85 and '86, they are both opposites. Last year's happy days are now boring, sleepy, tearjerky days. Siguro something happened to PX, maybe he got sick.  [ooh,ha-ha, what a concern! yeah, that's the men's common excuse] Anyway, I still like him because of love and he's still not here by my side. [haha]

This afternoon, I happened to see Ate Baybee (my other bff ,Lanie's elder sister, 19 years old then) at the waiting place for buses and jeeps at Carried [that's Philippine Lumber, what they really meant] I wasn't able to mention yesterday that Ate Baybee introduced a guy from their college to me. He's ok, kind of handsome, the quiet type like BB.. but you know me, when I'm seriously looking for someone else I ignore the person  who's just near me. Let's call this guy ES (Elevator shoes, coz he's tall) Well, I saw ES again today at Carried  and he was the only one I could ask where Ate Baybee went. So he answered:  "Rode a J & J bus going to Manaoag" Much later, here comes Ate Baybee alighting from the bus.  [Ate Baybee went joyriding the Dagupan-Binalonan route, as was her habit in those days.Please don't ask why.] Soon as she was near me, she whispered,smiling: "ES has a crush on you!" I just  looked at her as if I didn't hear anything. But really, how would I believe if ES has a crush on me when he doesn't say anything, kind of shy!

Cut this story short: We took the next bus home. We were just quiet for a while as we were seated in the 3-seater ones. I was seated in the middle of the two. Because of the awkward silence, I whispered asking something about PX, but Ate Baybee dismissed me with: "Will you please talk to ES?" Oh! Am I crazee here?!
A few minutes later, ES spoke up to me, kinda whispering: "Is that guy Baybee's boyfriend?" (referring to the bus conductor ahead)
Me answered: "I'm not sure"
Ate Baybee : "What? That guy, not my boyfriend!"
ES: "But you have a boyfriend, right?"
Ate Baybee: "Yes, of course!"
ES: "How does it feel to be in love?"
That's when I answered (mimicking Maricel Soriano): "It feels like heaven! But now I'm lying low, not in love! Hmp!"
Laughter, nervous laughter...[must have been a set-up that time]
Then Ate Baybee shocked me by her plans: "Both of you have no girlfriend/boyfriend. Hey, ES, it's settled then! On February 14 (pointing at both of us) it's a date, and I'm the chaperone. Okay?"
I BLUSHED.  I felt so icky because.. I ... don't... know. Perhaps I'm falling indeed though I try to control it.

Maybe that's what God wants. Maybe this is just a test for me if I'm faithful to PX. Well, I really am!

I love PX! (1,000,000,000x)

Read the next 80s diary entry here

Monday 021086
Evening

Good Evening, dear diary. I had a good day if only I didn't have fantasies some days ago.

I went to school feeling awkward of my hairdo. I seems I've got a lot of fans,ha. No kidding, I have another classmate,Daff, she also has a new hairdo but my seatmate Jerom was making fun of her, then said: "Your hair looks so much better, it looks good on you. You kind of resemble...." he trailed off because I wasn't really listening because I was paying attention to my other seatmate, another Jerome - he's the Filipino-American - who finally spoke up. I know this guy has a crush on me but won't admit it! Whenever Jerom would tell stories, Jerome would still look at me for approval before he gets to laugh. I don't know why. He has a crush on me? Hahaha! Anyways, the lessons for today were so easy, because I was so inspired! But that inspiration was gone. He sort of stood me up. Isn't it? I really waited but no PX came. I'm angry at him, so angry! I don't want to see him anymore!

Hey, I dreamt last night that I was watching a Menudo concert. I was late in going to the concert but when I entered the stadium, there were only a few people there so I took the frontrow,ha! That time, in my dream, Robby Rosa was singing solo. When he finished singing, he sat near another fan. But when he saw me, he smiled at me, I smiled back. He said "hello" and gestured me to come closer. I said to myself: "Who does he think he is?" So Robby Rosa came over to where I was. Then... no one woke me up, but I just did despite the wonderful dream. [hahaha, indeed! In reality, I get this dream now from what happened in February 12,1986. You'll find out later]

That's all I can write for now, I'm angry at PX. I hate PX! I hate PX! I hate PX!

I love Ralph! I love Ralph! I love Ralph!

WHAT A BORING DAY BUT EXPECT A RED VALENTINE!!!

 Red

Read the next 80s diary entry here 

Note: Wondering who is this PX from the 80s?

Sunday 020986
Evening
Hello. I hope someone can help me. I'm drowning in tears. [I'm laughing at this now] Somethings making me feel awful. Maybe I'm excited to see PX but I still fell I love Ralph very much. I don't know why I can't leave a person I've never heard a word from except a cheery greeting. Why is this so? I know that God really let us meet but it was a wrong time to realize this. Even when I often seen him before, Ralph was always there but we never talked. It's okay. But I'm really losing interest in him now and my feelings are all going toward PX but I still like Ralph too. I don't want to push him away totally. I know we were not steady but I feel that we were before but really we weren't. [What did I really mean that time.. I don't know, I'm just copying the text now]. 

 Maybe there were two people in this world before who just looked like us and fell in love. Maybe Ralph and I are the ones here now. I don't want to hurt him. You might say he won't be hurt because he never got to know me well. But what do I really feel? I love him, I don't want to hurt him coz I know how it feels to be left. But Ralph and I were never on. Why?Why? Why? I know something's wrong, but what? I have no close friends right now who can explain to me what I'm really feeling.
I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph. I love Ralph!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Red

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Friday 020786
Evening

Hello!Hello!Hello! I've got a decision! Here, I still don't know who won in the 1986 Snap Elections,huh! But here are the results in my analysis...I'll just let go of Ralph, maybe I'll just see when I meet him again in the summer. As for PX, he will be the one here for now.
Dapat dalawa yan! (wala na si Arnie dahil malabo, nakakatakot yun) [words taken from the Marcos tv ad again]

I think I am getting in love in the order of the songs I like best: ... 1st Because Of Love...
2nd If You're Not Here(By My Side)... 3rd Please Be Good To Me ... 4th Parque Del Oeste.

Dear Diary, will just explain later so you won't say I've cheated in the results,huh? Naku..ha!

Red

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Friday 010786

February 7,1988
Morning

Hello! It's election day today and I hope Cory Aquino will win as president in the 1986 elections.
I have my own polls. What my heart says. I don't know whom I really am interested in, is it Ralph? or PX? Naku ha, PX's last name is the same as Tita Cory's!

But I really feel something is wrong with this situation coz it seems 2 people will get hurt if, etc.
and 2 people will also be happy if,etc. But still we are three in all. But who? who? who?

If it's Ralph I choose, I love him so much, he looks like Robby Rosa, he's a great basketball player, he makes me nostalgic because he lives quite far in Tuguegarao, he is intelligent ( I heard), he likes me but he never said anything about going together at all. I'm not even sure if he has a girlfriend already. I'm not that beautiful and charming for him maybe. If he isn't in a relationship yet, does he love me? (no.) But I like him very much because I got used to being a crybaby always wanting to hear news about him. I always remember him for the song "Because Of Love" by Menudo. So, Ralph pa rin? [term taken from "Marcos Pa Rin"]

If I chose PX, he is just near and he likes me also. I've got mature minds as bridges / matchmakers. PX is good, honest, frank,etc. That makes him great for me but well, should I say: SOBRA NA, TAMA NA, PALITAN NA! (?) [this term taken from Former president Cory Aquino's 1986 election slogan]

So let's just wait and see and analyse. Won't choose the wrong way. If Marcos wins, I choose Ralph or if Aquino wins, I choose PX... hahaha, wrong. "I've got 50 advisers whom I haven't heard in my entire life, malabo, kaya for Mindanao, for my family back home in the farm - Marcos-Tolentino"
[term again gotten from a Marcos election advertisement. My apologies, I was a very hyperactive 14 year old with a very short attention span just to be funny :))]

ok, give me one day to analyse! GAME!

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[Ralph is a real person who resided in Tuguegarao, but he was never my friend, not even close. He was like an imaginary friend that I wished I knew up close. All the info I knew were those few details my younger cousins Lara and Dingdong tell me about. Truth, I do not exist in Ralph's world ;'( - but hey, he's on facebook! haha]

Thursday Morning
020686
February 6, 1986

Hello! I'm back home and I'm planning to go Downtown Dagupan this afternoon with my friend Betty. But let me tell you that I got  a letter from Saldie. He wrote me and just told me everything frankly; he really likes me (oh no!) but I'm still young. Oh, why does he think I'm still young?! Too young (?) well here I am about to get into my second boyfriend. (just don't mention the other guy, he was nothing, pleez!)

And about my next boyfriend to be, let's call him PX, (I mentioned his name earlier here in January 1986) am changing his name coz I may not know maybe someone's reading this Classica notebook. I even removed my crush list and pasted it some place. PX, as I heard from Betty, was inviting me thru my friends last week. My friends say it was his birthday then, but I didn't go because we went to Manila (for the long vacation as  declared by President Marcos last January 28 until February 9). But before I went with my folks to Manila I asked Betty to get PX' address coz we'll just send a birthday card. Just that, Betty gave my message. PX's answer: he will just see me at my school when classes resume. But I doubt if what Betty said was true, knowing her. okay..that's it!


[PX was the guy I've had the longest relationship with during my teenage years. I was always awed by him, everytime - that was how I saw him before, like the whole world stops when he was around... you know what that's like. If you read on, you'll see how it all turned out. :)]

Read the next 80's diary entry here